Why Are Weeping Willows Associated With Graves and Grief?

Walk through an old cemetery and you will often see a willow drooping over a stone, or carved on one. The image feels natural, and its history is more tangled than it looks.

Why is the weeping willow a symbol of grief?

Two reasons are usually given. The first is how it looks. The Massachusetts Historical Society explains that the weeping willow is so named because its leaves seem like tears falling from its branches, and that it is a symbol of mourning. It describes an embroidery made around 1803 to 1804 that shows children around an urn on a gravestone with a willow behind them.

The second is the Bible. Psalm 137 describes exiles by the rivers of Babylon who wept and hung their harps on the willows, according to the University of Vermont Libraries. In much of Western Europe, the weeping willow came to stand for sorrow and death.

Is the willow in the Bible really a willow?

Probably not. The International Dendrology Society explains that the botanist Linnaeus, who described the weeping willow in the 1730s, believed it came from ancient Babylon and was the Psalmist’s tree, and gave it the name Salix babylonica. But the “willows” of Babylon on the Euphrates are now identified as the Euphrates poplar, Populus euphratica. Oregon State University notes that the weeping willow is thought to have originated in China and was named from young garden specimens. So the scientific name rests on a mistake, though the symbol did not need the botany to be right.

When did willows start appearing on gravestones?

Around the 18th century, weeping willows began appearing on gravestones in New England, often with an urn, according to the University of Vermont Libraries. The Tufts Daily describes a change in American carving: the stern death’s-head images of the 1600s gave way over the 1700s to softer ones, and by the 19th century the urn and weeping willow were the popular new image. The Nashua Historical Society also includes the weeping willow among the symbols on its cemetery tour. For the wider shift in gravestone styles, see What Gravestones Say.

What did Napoleon’s grave have to do with it?

Napoleon died in exile on St Helena in 1821, and willows grew over his grave. The St Helena Heritage Trust says these willows became iconic in 19th-century pictures and writing about the island. In 1848 a visitor reported that souvenir hunters regularly stripped their leaves and branches until only stumps remained, and that new slips grown from the originals replaced them. The International Dendrology Society notes that a “Napoleon willow” once grew at Kew, raised from a cutting brought home in 1825.

Does the willow also stand for rebirth?

Yes. The Nashua Historical Society says the willow is also a symbol of rebirth, because it regrows easily: limbs can grow into new trees even if left on the ground. It connects the tree with immortality, life after death, and resurrection. So the same tree can stand for grief and for hope.

Can you plant a willow as a memorial?

Ask the cemetery first, since many have rules about planting. Oregon State University notes that Salix babylonica is not cold tolerant, being hardy only to USDA zone 6, and that many cultivated weeping willows are hybrids. See Memorial Trees and Memorial Projects and Why Is the Tree a Symbol of Life?. For more symbols, see Symbols of Life and Death.