Amish Funeral Traditions: What to Expect and How to Show Respect

Amish funerals are simple, communal, and quiet, and the whole settlement helps. This guide is for neighbors, coworkers, friends, and professionals, and for Amish families who want to see how practice is described by others. It describes the Old Order Amish and common practice, not a rule for every settlement.

Who is this guide about?

The Amish are a Christian group who live in settlements across the United States, and this guide describes Old Order practice. Practices differ by settlement, and the Young Center for Anabaptist and Pietist Groups at Elizabethtown College notes that all reflect the same core values: simplicity, humility, and mutual aid. This guide does not cover Mennonites, Brethren, or other Plain groups, because we found no reliable source on them that we could responsibly use, and their practices vary widely.

What values shape Amish funerals?

Simplicity, humility, and mutual aid. The Young Center explains that the community springs into action at the news of a death, and that well-established funeral customs relieve the family of difficult choices. Plain coffins and small, equal-sized gravestones reflect equality in death. An Amish woman told Religion News Service that praise belongs to God rather than to people, which fits the absence of eulogies, and the same report notes there are no flowers.

What happens after a death?

The Young Center describes the steps: in some settlements a non-Amish undertaker moves the body to a funeral home for embalming, and within a day the body returns to the home, without cosmetic changes, in a simple hardwood coffin. Family members of the same sex dress the body in white, and a woman may be dressed in the white cape and apron she wore at her wedding. Embalming practice differs between communities: Amish America says that in most communities the body goes to a funeral home for embalming and then returns home for viewing, while the Young Center describes this in some settlements.

Friends and relatives visit the family and view the body in a first-floor room of the home for two days before the funeral. Religion News Service describes the room as stripped of furniture and decoration. Meanwhile, community members dig the grave by hand, usually in a family cemetery nearby, and others prepare food, seating, and space for horses and carriages.

What might I see at the funeral?

Several hundred guests may attend a funeral held in a barn, shop, or the family’s home. Religion News Service describes it in two parts: a small service at the home in the morning, then a larger service led by two or three ministers. The hearse is a large black carriage pulled by horses, and it leads a long procession of carriages to the burial ground. There is a brief viewing and a short service at the grave, where pallbearers lower the coffin and shovel soil as the bishop reads a hymn. Gravestones are small, plain, and usually the same size. Afterward, the community shares a meal.

How can I be a good guest?

Follow the family’s and community’s lead, and ask a friend from the community what to expect. Do not bring flowers. Be ready for a quiet, plain setting with no decoration and no eulogies. Park where you are directed, since a large number of horses and carriages need space. Offer practical help if the family or community welcomes it, since helping is how the settlement shows care. Ask before taking photographs.

What should professionals and families think about?

Funeral directors who work with an Amish family can ask the family how they want the body prepared, whether embalming is desired, and how the coffin and home viewing will be arranged. A funeral-industry guide says cremation is generally not practiced by the Amish. Families in some settlements make limited use of professional services, so each request is best made directly. For general options, see Can You Have a Funeral Without a Funeral Home? and Protestant Funeral Traditions.

What doesn’t this guide cover?

• Mennonite, Brethren, and other Plain groups, which differ from the Amish and from each other
• Differences between Amish settlements, which can be significant, including language, singing, and embalming
• Theology and worship, which belong to the community
• Review by the community. This guide needs review by Amish community members or scholars before it is promoted widely

Practices vary widely by community, family, and faith. This is general information, not religious or legal advice and not a substitute for the family’s own guidance. It has not yet been reviewed by members of the Amish community.